Question: My wife wants to get a divorce because she thinks I'm seeing another woman. She said she found text messages and pictures of me and the other lady, who lives in Savannah, Georgia. She told me that our 32 years of marriage don't matter and she wants a divorce and that she's done with my fooling around.
I said I'd go to marriage counseling but she said I cheated so much that she can't trust me and she said I'm a major porn addict because I look at pornography 4 hours a night and spend maybe $500 a month on it. I told her I'd get help for the infidelity and the porn addiction but she won't bite and she said she wants a divorce.
I'm worried that if we get a divorce I'll lose my pension and have to pay her alimony. I really want to keep my pension because I've worked hard for it. She never worked and she only stayed at home and took care of our 5 kids, who are good kids and really easy to take care of. She just hung out at home and drank a lot of wine, played tennis and spent my money.
She doesn't want me to tell anyone that she used to be a prostitute years ago when she needed cash real bad. But I will tell people if I have to.
Now I need to know how pensions are split or divided when you get divorced. I think I need a good Roswell divorce lawyer before I get in too much trouble by trying to do this thing myself and lose all my money.
K.R. in Roswell, GA
Answer: In a divorce, a pension is divided using a Qualified Domestic Relations Order, known as a QDRO. To split a pension you would need to have a QDRO in place. And it is very important that the QDRO is properly drafted. If it is not, there can be major problems in the future.
Pensions are assets and are thus often the subjects of negotiation in divorces. Sometimes pensions can involve a large amount of money, other times they are only a small percentage of an individual's assets.
We have seen many situations where pensions are the subject of negotiations between divorcing spouses. In a long-term marriage like yours, the fact that your wife wasn't employed will likely not prevent her from getting at least a portion of your pension. Please call us so we can discuss your matter in greater specificity and help you determine how much of your pension will be impacted by a divorce.
When you have QDRO questions, call us at 678-215-4106.
Because so much is at stake, you need the best representation you can get. Having served as a Magistrate Judge, Assistant Attorney General and Senior Assistant County Attorney seriously helps our clients.